Stick like a leech

When I was young, I often overheard my mum telling other people that I stick to her like a leech. I remembered going to toilet whenever she goes to toilet...playing in the garden whenever she was doing some gardening, and disturbing her when she was resting on the bed!
Yes, I also remembered wearing my dad's t-shirt as a one-piece "gown" for me!

Now, when I go to the toilet, Iz will want to follow... when I sleep, he will follow and disturb me if he is not sleepy. For the past 3 mornings when I purposely woke up early to do more things at home before I head to work, Iz "discovered that I was gone" from the room and cried, "MAMA... I wan't MAMAAA!"

Arrghh! I have to stop doing my things in the kitchen and rush straight upstairs to make sure he stops crying before he wakes everyone up!

Well, this morning he woke up about 6am... and played till he fell down from the bed and cried AGAIN and his noise woke Amanda up at 6.30am....

Now, I have got a leech sticking to me till I get to work...

Losing hair

Hair everywhere, fine hair and thick strand of hairs... The fine one belongs to Amanda. Thicker strand of hair belongs to me! hahah... this is the 4th month where I thought only my hair would fall and not the baby. Isaac's hair was shaved the last time (during his full moon) and so I didn't think that baby's hair would shed during the 4th month as well, same time as mine!
Her fine hair tickles me especially when I feed or carry her. And it is sometimes annoying when I can't seem to sweep the very fine hair off my face!
Well, this is a new discovery for me!

How to deal with tantrums?

Article from Margaret Saunders

Initially tantrums are an emotional expression with the purpose of getting attention of the parent or caregiver. Then this gets a result.

So how do we control and moderate this behaviour? Changing the behaviour in babies and young children is all about motivation. And motivation can take two forms.

Positive motivation - that is encouragement, rewards and love.

Negative or fear motivation - that is threats of punishment or confiscating possessions.

Which method to use depends entirely on the child's age and the relationship with the carer and which one you are more comfortable with.

Here are several methods starting with a soft approach which we recommend, then followed by firmer alternatives.

1. The Firm Hug Method

When a child is in the midst of a tantrum, give them a firm loving hug. This requires the parent or carer to be in full emotional control. It could be argued that holding a wriggling screaming child may or may not be practical, but this method works very well in some cases. And is not so embarrassing if you are in a public place, such as a supermarket.

2. The Ignore Or Divert Method

This does sound like a contradiction but please read on. A tantrum is designed to get your attention. If you just keep on going and totally ignore that the tantrum is happening, it sends the clear message to the toddler that his actions are having NO EFFECT AT ALL. That may work by itself, but the method is made a lot more powerful by diverting the child's attention to something totally unrelated.

For example: in a shop, a toddler may tantrum to get a toy or snack etc, so you just ignore the fireworks and perhaps drop a coin and suggest a search, or urgently suggest to find a particular shopping item.

3. The Star Chart Method

This is our favourite. Create a chart with about twenty or thirty stars or dots on it. Cover the chart with clear laminate. Then use a whiteboard marker to colour stars for good behaviour. With your toddler's input decide on some reasonable rewards. They don't have to cost money ... A Trip to their favourite park, playing with friends, a small $ reward (which can also be used to introduce concepts of saving money and investing in a bank account i.e.: spend half and save half). If you spend a bit of time building up the reward in your toddlers mind, you be amazed how powerful this system can be. (Also could use a blackboard and chalk for your chart if this is easier for you.)

4. The Quiet Corner Method:

Decide on a location in your home and name it the quiet corner. You may want to place a chair in the location and call it the thinking chair (for older toddlers). I really don't like to name items the naughty corner or the naughty chair or any other negative description. Here we want to focus on the positive. When your baby or toddler has misbehaved they are either placed or sent to this location for a few minutes, allowing the situation to calm down and diffuse. If the child refuses to stay, always send them back. If they are extremely persistent, you might have to consider another method. But this system can work, and its very boring for a child to be facing a wall.

And it doesn't hurt if your child is old enough to ask for either an apology or ask how they could behave differently next time.

5. Smacking:

From our point of view this is not an option. If you have found yourself smacking your child please review our options for alternatives. The long term damage to a child caused by smacking is enormous. If you feel you need help from a professional to either curb your own behaviour or that of your child please, please seek help. If need be please call us so that we can point you in the right direction or offer you our support and ideas and positive encouragement.

And please, remember, that whichever of these methods works for you whenever you carry out a toddler taming solution always keep your heart open. You cannot love your child too much. Always reward and praise your child whenever they do the "right thing", and always tell them how much you love them, over and over again.

Some things can wait....

"When my little one is having a hard time, I drop everything — no dishes, no laundry, no nothin' — and just cuddle, play, read, whatever makes him happy. Sure, the house is a wreck, but the house can wait; my son can't." — Kara

I guess its really true... to be patient especially when Iz is not feeling well.
I have to let go of doing other house chores to cater to his needs, sacrifice my sleep/nap, yup, whatever to make him happy and make sure he gets well soon. Also, I need to work around the breastfeeding time to make sure I also pump out my milk on time. Yes, there are so many things to do with 2 kids around. However, staying with my in-laws makes things a bit difficult as they would think that I am doing things "half-way" and leaving mess around! In my mind, I will clear that LAATTERR.... and most of the time I won't forget about it (unless Bernard is handling it!). I will always attend to my child first... and stop worrying or fearing about what others think about me. Sometimes, I can tell them that I will clear it later, but I can't mention it all the time about little things!

I have learnt that I cannot live under other people's expectations all the time. To be a good parent, I will stand up on my own opinions, my own maternal instinct, and the greatest of all is to make sure my motive is based on LOVE. There is no manual for bringing up a child perfectly, nor a troubleshooting method for each circumstances, as every individual is unique. Just to bring up a child in a loving environment is my aim as a parent. PERFECT LOVE DRIVES OUT FEAR.

3 mths old pic...

Fruit of the day...

Just a thought about fruits... I mean it is important for me to try TRY to have at least a fruit per day. And there has been some hype recently about fruits enzyme, making me want to make my own fruit enzyme (dragon fruit sounds interesting), but I still don't have the know-how and time yet! And well, today, as I read the scripture, I was reminded about the more important fruit for the soul!

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control... -Gal 5:22

As a parent, it is important for me to set a good example and sometimes, because of work-stress, fatigue; I just lack direction and get really impatient, rough, and lack of self-control towards my kid.
Yes, I guess I need to "chew" on this verse as I chew on my apple that I brought to work today.

Lord, help me to bear the fruit of the Spirit that my children will see Your goodness through me. Also, forgive me for neglecting this spiritual fruit. Amen.

4 months....

4 months of breastfeeding! I wonder how long can I commit to this awesome task!
It is an awesome commitment...

It is a joy!
-especially at night where you don't have to get up and make milk in a hurry, make sure it is the right temperature and right amount, feed her properly, burp her, then wash up the bottle!
- when baby just drink and look satisfied when full :)
- you don't have to worry about which brand is the best in the market cos nothing beats breast milk! Proud to be giving the best milk in the world!
- when baby knows how to latch properly and suck well directly. (I didn't bf Isaac directly, so the feeling is a bit different actually. But eventually, he still fed on bm till 6.5mths old)


It is a wonder!
- that God has provided everything good in one source of food! Formula milk doesn't have any antibodies and is a far duplication of mother's milk! BM already contained all the source of DHA, AA... whatever A lah!
- that the breast milk content changes over time to suit the baby's need! Incredible!
- Supply = Demand ! nothing to worry that it is not enough!


It is a commitment!
-especially when you are outside shopping... or getting a haircut... whatever it is you need to do outside, you have to think of how long it takes cos you need to get the milk out on time!

Breastfeeding website

"Are we old yet?"

I forwarded an e-mail to my dad recently about some jokes regarding "Are we old yet?".
I didn't expect any reply cos it was just a forwarded email with jokes.
His unexpected reply was:
"no not yet. old is when u stop working"

so, i paused and think... I felt like a guilty mother again going to work this morning, leaving my son crying in front of my car! When the time comes for me to stop working, then I will instead appreciate the time to work!

Anyway, I am still glad that my parents are working! I just hope my son will grow up soon to stop crying every morning when I leave to work.

Amanda is teething!

Yup! Pretty early as she is just approaching 4 months!
Two bottom teeth coming out as we can see the white layer just beneath her gums.
It is true that before teething, she has those "pearly" stools (chinese say its called "nga-see" or teeth-shit! hahha)
She is also drooling, and putting her whole fist into her mouth!!

Bro n Sis!

Here is the latest pic taken last Sunday at home.
Isaac was acting like a baby, he was babbling away, " nyeeeh nyeeh, nyeeh nyeeeh".

Cutting grass

Isaac's Sunday activity- followed his ta-ta to cut grass! It was a cloudy day and good to keep in touch with nature.













The sweat is making him itch! Look at the big scissors!

To squat or not?

One evening,we were out having dinner in a restaurant in Balakong, not a fancy restaurant, just a non-air con one. Then after finishing his dinner, Iz wanted to pass motion. So we brought him to the toilet (a very Malaysian toilet!) and it was the squatting type. Bernard brought him there, asked him to remove his pants and squat. Guess what?? He doesn't know how to squat and shit!
He was reluctant to go near the bowl! The floor was wet, and it looked slippery to me!
Iz has not used this type of toilet before, nor squat to pass motion before!
So we just decided to quickly pay the bill and rush home instead.
When we reached home about 10 mins later, his urge has also gone!